As many of you know, a couple of weeks ago, my partner and I ventured into our first play party together, marking our initial foray into nonmonogamy after a year of monogamy. We chose Top Floor, a party that held a special place in my heart from when I first discovered the New York play party scene over a decade ago.
I’m thrilled to report that we had an amazing time—even better than we could have hoped for. We connected with a wonderful woman who was looking for exactly the kind of experience we were offering. She was not only excited to join us but also experienced in playing with couples. Her ability to communicate her needs and respect ours made the encounter incredibly fulfilling for all three of us.
Given my history with Top Floor—it was one of my main play party homes until they paused events in 2016—I was curious to see if it still held the same magic. I’m happy to say that not only is it as good as I remembered, but it’s actually significantly better on several levels.
Here are some of the highlights that made the night unforgettable:
The Venue and Atmosphere
- Gorgeous Setting: The party takes place on the top floor of a swanky hotel in downtown Manhattan, spanning three penthouse suite apartments connected across two floors.
- Elegant Start: The evening begins with everyone dressed to the nines in elegant attire until midnight, giving off an “Eyes Wide Shut” vibe without any pretentiousness.
- Festivities Begin: After midnight, attendees change into their sexy outfits, and the real fun kicks off. The initial cocktail hour provides the perfect opportunity to mingle, flirt, dance, and make connections.
The Crowd
- Fun and Sexy Vibe: The attendees exuded a warm and inviting energy, making it easy to connect and engage with others.
- Diversity Appreciated: There was a decent amount of diversity in body types and sexual orientations. Unlike many other play parties, bisexual men and play are welcome, which adds to the inclusive atmosphere.
- Mix of Attendees: A healthy blend of couples, single men, and single women attended, promoting a balanced and dynamic environment.
- Vanilla Meets Kink: The party caters to a range of interests, with spaces for both vanilla group play and designated rooms for kink activities.
The Experience
- Respectful and Warm Interactions: We found everyone to be approachable and friendly. It wasn’t cliquish at all, which can sometimes be a barrier at such events.
- Ample Space: Despite hosting nearly 200 people, there was enough room for everyone to play and enjoy themselves comfortably.
- Great Music and Ambiance: The music set the perfect tone, and the decorations added to the festive atmosphere.
- Delightful Extras: Tasty treats were passed around throughout the night, and for those who stayed until 4 a.m., delicious breakfast sandwiches were served to replenish after an energetic evening.
Vetting and Inclusivity
- Thorough Vetting Process: Anyone can apply for membership, but acceptance depends on a comprehensive vetting process, including reviewing your application and a one-hour Zoom call. This ensures a safe and respectful environment for all attendees.
- Fair Payment Structure: While it’s not the cheapest party in town, it’s reasonably priced considering the high-end experience. Everyone pays the same amount, promoting equality—a refreshing change from events that charge couples or single men significantly more.
- Volunteer Opportunities: To encourage economic diversity, Top Floor offers discounted tickets for those willing to volunteer two hours before or during the party.
Consent and Safety
- Clear Consent Guidelines: They have detailed and clearly communicated guidelines on how consent should be negotiated. The party operates on an “ask before you touch” model, with no casual touch allowed without explicit affirmative consent.
While this isn’t my preferred standard (I usually enjoy environments where casual touch without verbal consent can be part of the negotiation), I respect and appreciate this approach. It protects a wide range of attendees, especially those new to the scene or less experienced in negotiating consent.
- STI Testing Requirement: All attendees are required to provide STI testing results from the last three months. This promotes a culture of regular testing and health awareness, which is crucial in our community.
- Substance Policy: There’s a clear emphasis on remaining relatively sober and refraining from drug use. Anyone seen using substances is removed from the party. Having been at way too many play parties where people were literally too high to function sexually—on drugs like cocaine, ecstasy, or ketamine, none of which are particularly conducive to sexual arousal, orgasm, or clear consent negotiation—I was pleasantly surprised to experience an environment where people were fully present and engaged.
All in all, I’d give this party an A+. My return to Top Floor was everything I hoped for and then some. I don’t know if all their events are consistently this good or if this one was exceptional, but I highly recommend giving it a shot if you’re interested.
If you decided to go, I’d love to hear about your experience. Did you enjoy it as much as I did?
If you’re in or near New York and curious about exploring this scene, Top Floor might just be the perfect place to start. The next party is on January 11th, and if you’re interested you can submit your application here!
With love,
Dr. Zhana
